Are rich people worse at parenting than the middle class? When we look at a jumbo-sized simpleton dance with the 3 Khans, merely because he has the Ambani tag to his name; what do we feel? Envy? Snobbish disdain? Or just enjoy the entertainment?
The daily harangue against the “Super Brat” is misdirected. The conversation should be about Porche’s Parenting. I see most readers nod their heads in vigorous assent. But are we, as respectable middle–class citizens doing a better job?
There was a belief held some 50 years ago, that Indian parenting was superlative. Most parents in their 60s remember their parents with love and respect. But times have changed. The simple rules that governed those lives have dissolved in a complex, ever-changing world.
Don’t lie, don’t cheat, don’t steal. Today it’s about appearances, marketing, and making good.
No sex before marriage. Today it’s about sex education, accepting atypical sexual preferences, good touch-bad touch, gender bias….
Then it was about writing essay answers for every subject. Today it’s about MCOT. Even for language. (In fact, the one value that has not changed is corruption. It was a bad word, and it is so today. For a country steeped in corruption, most parents justify their unearned gains through facile arguments. Everyone does it. Salaries are not enough. I do it for my family. What it DOES do is erode the foundation of good parenting. Children are too straight thinking, not to see through nonsense.)
It is this constant change that confuses and defeats parents. It results in what can only be called Cowardly Parenting. The confusion and incomprehension created by a changing world prevents them from responding sensibly and responsibly towards their children. How often do we hear the phrase: “Aaj kal ke bacche bade smart hain”? True, exposure and the internet leave less space for the innocence of yesteryear; but information is not knowledge, and knowledge is only the first step towards wisdom. So trust your acquired wisdom. Parenting will always be a first-time experience. Even for your second or umpteenth child. And no parent doesn’t look back and thinks that he should have done things differently. Take a step back, when confronted with any of the endless situations and tell yourself to trust yourself. You are always going to be the only parents your kids will have to trust yourself.
