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Anand Niketan

Nurturing Relations with Emotional Intelligence

To build good relations one needs to learn the art of reciprocating correctly. This is only possible when we are emotionally wise or intelligent. Humans are a package, filled with emotions.

According to Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence is a cluster of skills and competencies focused on four capabilities: self-awareness, relationship management, and social awareness. 

Six major visible emotions play a vital role in building or breaking relationships. If we are able to manage these in the right manner for ourselves and others, we will be considered to be emotionally intelligent. Felt to be the dire need of the hour, here are a few tips and suggestions:

Happiness: Your happiness should not be a nuisance for others & others’ happiness should be celebrated with the same energy and enthusiasm till it does not turn into a nuisance.

Anger: For self, when in anger, do not talk, or if getting angry stop talking. For the other person’s anger, practice FEEL FELT FOUND TECHNIQUE. Convey a message to the angry person “I can feel what you have felt and I have found a solution to your concern.”

Sorrow: For self, have faith and look for ways to resolve the issue at hand. For others’ sorrow, console and help. Practicing empathy is the best practice.

Fear: Someone gave a full form to fear- ‘False Evidence Appearing Real.’ So, check for yourself are those fears really genuine or hyped. If can’t deal with them on your own talk it out, seek help, seek advice. For others’ fears again listen to them and give assurance and solutions to their fears. Give them the feeling that you are all ears and are with them; they are not alone to face the situation.

Disgust: When you do not like something, how you react to it is going to decide the degree of disgust. That reaction will decide the relationship ‘build or break’ phase. Learn to be responsive instead of being reactive.

Contempt: It is all about caring for others’ feelings. “I don’t care” is against emotional intelligence practices. Respect the other person’s presence. Respecting is not accepting it is listening to the other person.

Emotional Intelligence is about listening both to your heart and your head. In isolation, both can make errors!!

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