A colleague of mine was witness to a small incident in a park of sec 26. A little 8 year old boy was being alienated from the group of kids of which he was a part of since long. A 10 year old girl was preventing the other girls from talking and playing with him. She was saying that he was a bad boy as he touched her while playing! The little boy did not understand what was happening. The precocious girl called her mother who whisked her away and was chiding her to be more careful.
This got me thinking about it. I questioned myself about how much is too much sometimes. Though it is very necessary to make very young boys and girls aware of their safety, it should be age appropriate information.
Children don’t need detailed information.. Just acceptance of their bodies and calm parents who are comfortable discussing issues related to their feelings, emotions and making them feel confident.
Parents only talk of stranger danger but forget to empower children that they are the “boss of their bodies” and should be able to say No even to a simple thing like their hair being ruffled if they don’t like it.
The affects of such embarrassment and humiliation has long lasting physical, cognitive and psychological effects on a young boy or girl.
Parents need to be sensitised about this and should help their child to become empowered but not suspicious of all people. Don’t rob them of the magic and innocence of their childhood till they are a little older. A child up to the age of 10 does not know a good or bad touch. He or she knows a comfortable or uncomfortable one. It is parental responsibility to monitor them.
Thus HOW much becomes TOO much, at times.
by Priyali Prakash with inputs by Sumita Pillai, an expert in Special Education and child development
