Welcome to Jaypee Wishtown! An idyllic place for us to live a peaceful life with our parents, our kids, our pets. So much greenery and quiet now combined with an internal racetrack. Because who needs speed breakers? They just slow us down drastically.
Because the excitement of high-speed racing shouldn’t be limited to big tracks where we have to pay to speed our cars through; it belongs right here in our neighbourhood.
Speed breakers in a residential township were obviously a bad idea. What’s higher priority – safety for our parents and kids, or an individual’s choice to drive a Lambo/ Thar/ souped-up Polo GT at great speed and pretend to be Lewis Hamilton?
Now I know, a few street dogs have already become casualties of this brilliant decision. Including Sultan, who thrived for many years and was loved by so many, before he was ploughed down by a speeding car and died a miserable death.
And, eventually, some people might get run over by a speeding car, too. But that’s just collateral damage. We reserve our right to drive at 80 kmph right next to a school, a temple, a market, a footpath where people are walking their pets and pushing prams.
That’s what freedom of choice is about. Everyone needs to hear my race car vrooming through. What else did I get the silencer removed for, if you can’t even hear it from your penthouse apartment at 5 AM?
I wonder why the authorities are now confused about the implementation, though. A while after removing the speed breakers, they put up barricades. Almost like they’re not very confident about the choice they made.
Though I don’t mind all the barricades, either. When I enter the township, it looks like I’m entering the Tihar Jail complex, it makes me feel so much more secure. Oh and all the twisting and swerving I have to do – it’s like Mario Kart, in real life!
The authorities are obviously waiting for a much more serious accident to happen before they bring the speed breakers back. And the speed breakers will *definitely* be back, sooner or later. The only question is, will they wait for someone to get run over before they do it? Most likely so.
So, good luck; watch out. Because when you’re out for a walk with your parents, you’re competing for ownership of the road with speed demons. And so far, given the bizarre decision-making to prioritize speed over human and animal safety (INSIDE a residential township!), the speed demons are winning.
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